Can you believe

This little rock star is almost 1? It seems like just overnight he added a ton of skills. He can stand, say bye-bye, ball, dada, mamma, and duck. (I am desperately hoping that is what he is saying - we all know about my husband's potty mouth)

He loves to eat, but still prefer his baby food. He will longingly gaze at you while you eat, however if you offer him anything he puts it in your mouth after he tastes it. YUM! Still no teeth - but I can see the bottom two getting ready to poke through any day now. He is such a giggly baby, and that makes the sleepless nights easier. Yes, our sweet Monkey has yet to spend an entire night in his crib.

He is such a treasure, and combined with delicate flower, I am really starting to question having another baby. I really thought I did, but then when I think about going through another baby year I become apprehensive. I also know we can provide for two children well, three would slim the opportunities we could offer.

If you have more than one child, what was the deciding point? If you have more than two, do you ever feel stretched (emotionally and financially)

I would be eager to hear what you have to say. Now I have a birthday party to plan!

You can't read my mind?

I often forget that in order to communicate, one actually needs to share information. I have a bad habit of being private. I don't think someone can have a blog and be a private person. By default you're letting it all hang out. I am mostly OK with that part. I would never sensor knowing my husband, dad, and friends read my blog.

What I need though is a mind reading post process, because honestly I have not made time for blogging. I would like to say it is because I haven't made time for myself; that isn't a true statement. Have I been busy? Yes. Has Monkey been acting like a maniac and not sleeping? Yes. Do I have time to log into facebook for a few minutes? You guessed it!

I do like to keep my blogs light. I like to think I add a little humor. I don't like repetition. I feel like I am cheating if all of my blogs are based on surveys. That is just a long way to say I have a lot on my mind lately that is neither light or funny. I haven't wanted to take five minutes to share. And I guess I just wanted to feel like life was perfect enough and I wouldn't need to burden anyone with my problems. Honestly - they are small and insignificant. And I think that is the other piece - there are so many families out there that share their heart wrenching stories, I just don't think my bad day at work or the havoc Monkey causes would be meaningful.

It sounds silly when I say it, but I am terrified of becoming a blogger that has something heart wrenching happen. My husbands is highly superstitious. I think it is rubbing off. I read about this family in January and it has stayed on my mind since. I just can't get over how devastated they must be. I know it is coincidence, but Monkey has been getting constant sinus infections and I am just been terrified that we could be the next McClenahans. Silly I know. Ever since I lost my mother so suddenly - I just keep waiting for it to happen again.

So there it is. I know I am not going to tempt fate just by blogging, and yes, that has been the main reason for my pause. And please, feel free to poke fun. LOL - just saying out loud, make me feel better. I will blog more and worry less. It will never be daily, but it will be more than bimonthly. Or at least until I can find a confidant psychic. Then she will do it for me.